Android Barista

Earlier during the week, while pounding miles on the treadmill, I began to drool watching an ad of a robotic-styled brewer which makes 5 types of coffees. Although I tried hard to remember the name, it slipped off my mind even before the re-run of the same ad came on. So, I decided to remember the TV station airing it, and hoped that they are homogeneously enticing audiences online.
During the lull of the afternoon,  I searched high and low on the TBS website, but found nothing. Google also helped me not.
Oddly, 'Spam' in a dud account rescued me from the kerfuffle. In the span of the afternoon I'd got three email adverts pimping the Tassimo Brewbot.

Agog at the prospect of asking Santa of a swanky Home Brewing System by Bosch, I clicked on every link on the page...and ricked.
The overweening machine makes 7 different beverages; of these is also tea and cocoa, so that's just 5 beverages relevant to me. I'm still interested, and listening.
The video broke into a discussion of pods - coffee conveniently packaged for single servings - which in this case are referred as T-discs. Cappuccino, latte and espresso I can already make with my DeLonghi Coffee Maker, which makes a whole pot of coffee at once. So why should I trade up?
Unlike what some of the advertising implies, it doesn’t even turn into a robot and bring me my coffee. Else $129, and surplus for the pods would have been totally worth it.

Instant Bumming Out

Disclaimer: I am not a coffee snob, but I expect a well-made cup of mocha.

Leaving aside my recent chronicles of java ventures, I've never had such a bad coffee-day (akin to bad hair days). The happy dust blew off somewhere yesterday.
I had to start out early in the morning, even before the sun was up! Divergently, I reached for a pack of Instant Coffee Drink Mix. Estimating that water takes 2-3 minutes to boil was a misjudgment that produced a cupful of scorching syrup which  parched my throat and annihilated my taste buds. As the day peeped over the horizon, I purported that maybe I'd been in too much of a hurry, and made a hash out of it.

During the dash at a dealership (the party was out assaying cars), I graciously accepted the offer for a cup of joe. The snack pit stop had a flask of hot water with a carton of non-dairy creamer and cane sugar. Per contra, by the time I'd walked up the two-leveled stairs and taken my seat, the coffee had become tepid. This time I was sullen about the cold draft which had dashed in with the Highlander.
I realize that this drama is beginning to sound a lot like Goldilocks and the three bears. Regrettably, I wasn't lucky the third time too. After a hearty lunch at an Udipi restaurant (which queerly even serves delicious Chana Bhatura), suggestion was made that we skip the Filter Coffee there for a finer cuppa at the neighborhood temple. Always up for a coffee bonanza, we walked first thing into the temple's canteen. I was forlorn that the counter had the same triad as the dealership, instead of the filter coffee canister, which the friend had attested was exemplary on account that his father had two cups or so on his last visit. Crestfallen, I carefully measured all the essentials. And it turned out to be by far the worst coffee I recall of my life. It was bitter, burnt, watery; in plain words disgusting. Trying to remain civil, I pretended to sip on the cup as crowds of devotees passed by. Eventually, I poured the coffee into the restroom sink, and scoured for some drinking water to shower away the aftertaste. A bottle of water, and full-strength spearmint chewing gum relieved my taste buds. But the scar of this memory is going to keep me wary of Instant Coffee for a long, long time.

Air Burst

On boring days, like today, I like to try something commoving.
Back home in India, with no fear of fire alarms being set off, I'd burn a bunch of matchsticks and swoosh them to create eldritch patterns (captured on camera), smelt glass pieces, or simply throw in combustible material into the candle chamber, and shoot the reacting flames. As you can see, I have a great affinity for flares.

Picture Courtesy CafePress

So what has this eccentric inclination got to do with the goings-on at The Qahwa Room?
Usually, after making a pot of coffee, I wait until the next afternoon to empty out the filter chamber.But the lull at work time bucked me to unlatch the filter chamber while it was still letting steam off; just a minute after I'd switched the machine off.
Ended up with a bantam explosion of expended coffee all across the counter, and the kitchen floor. Only advantage was I have been spared the trouble of forking out caked coffee for the steeping tomorrow.

Battle of the Brews

Picture Courtesy FoodEducate.com

Coffee vs Tea: The rivalry between the world's two most popular drinks has always steeped strong. It's like asking an animal lover - whether they like pet feline or canine. Whatever be your answer, you and your adversary will end up arguing like cats and dogs.

As a java-enthusiast, whenever I have an upset stomach, I concoct a strong cup of tea, and the uneasiness passes away quickly. This antidote, espoused by my mother, works equally well in the reverse as well. If you savor a daily cuppa tea, coffee can do wonders for your unsettled stomach.

Per contra, there are several who duly enjoy tea and coffee. Markedly, my brother enjoys his Godiva Chocolate: Crème Brulée   just as much as his Old Pu-erh Tea.

Picture Courtesy Moillusions

Aberrant though is an HR-duo from my erstwhile workplace. After my job interview (where they made it plain that I was being hired), they invited me to the kitchenette. While I poured myself an ambrosial espresso, they placed two teabags in each of their cups, and proceeded to follow me suit (i.e. they filled their cups with espresso's). They must have noticed my jaw drop to the floor, because they exchanged discerning glances and  proceeded to splash in two tablespoons of sugar in each cup (mind you, these were cups, not mugs).
While tea-drinkers patron the shrubbery leaves for their health benefits, and I can vouch that nothing can energize you instantly better than a cup of strong mocha, this wicked concoction is beyond my comprehension. After working closely working with them over the next year, the palpable shock reduced over time, but I could never cave in to their badgering to try that amalgamation.

Instant Coffee

During a recent stop at Cleveland, I was offered a cup of coffee. The sweet and creamy serving threw me back two decades into the era when we were simply called 'children', since the term 'tweens' had not yet been coined.
As kids, my brother and I were rarely presented with any beverage except milk, mixed with Bournvita, Complan, Boost, or if it was a special day, then Cadbury's Drinking Chocolate.

Ergo, on visits to a relatives house, while the parents would be served piping cups of masala chai, we got cups of a beige blend. This was the funnest part of the excursion, since I got to see them brewing it too. And the decoct prepared by my host in Cleveland made me all sappy. In case you have never had the good fortune to have tasted this mnemonic of a coffee, follow instructions below.

Take one cup milk, and bring it to boil. Add one tablespoon sugar (you can add more if you are sure nobody is watching your weight). Steep it for five minutes. Add 1/4 to 1/2 teaspoon of Instant Coffee (Bru or Nescafe). Pour from a height into a cup so that it froths up at the rim, like the guy in the adjoining picture.

Sit back in a cushy chair, and enjoy!

Latte Liabilities

A few weeks ago I posted about the FDA being up in arms against Four Loko for creating a lethal beer and Java concoction.
While assaying a volunteer position at Volunteer Match today, I was dismayed to learn of Caffeine Awareness Alliance (CAA), an anti-brigade which counsels people to stay away from cafés. The organization is a

non-profit grassroots organization committed to educating consumers about the dangers caffeine intoxication and dependency

Not someone who simply dismisses adversaries for their disagreeable beliefs, I went on to read details of their cause. Turns out, there are lots of foolish ones out there misuse, abuse and get addicted to comforting coffea.
And its not just coffee; your intake of caffeine accounts the chocolate, soft drink, functional energy drink, beauty products, caffeinated water, frozen dessert and over-the-counter drugs you consume each day. I am pleased to report that I used the Caffeine Calculator, and came with under 200mgs of caffeine in a day.

I knew a colleague during my client servicing days at a JWT who was a caffeine addict. She had given standing instructions to the server in our section of the office to bring her a cup of black coffee every hour after 9am, with a break for lunch, and then continue onwards till she left. Clients can sometimes be very demanding on ad agencies; so staying back till 9-10pm was not uncommon. It boggles me to imagine the measure of stimulants she was retaining!

Basic Terminology

A few days ago, I was discussing my fascination with coffee makers which was initiated by Croma's selection of personal coffee machines. Although I can't visit the stores anymore, the place hasn't stopped fascinating me. So, I was browsing through their website, and came across this cheat sheet called Basic of Coffee maker Terminology. 

Pleased to learn that I knew all these basic terminology, I figured that if you are a filtered coffee novice, this will be a helpful guide when you prod around to master the brewing techniques.

Coffee PoV

As soon as coffee is in your stomach, there is a general commotion. Ideas begin to move...similes arise, the paper is covered. Coffee is your ally and writing ceases to be a struggle. 

Honor de Balzac is spot-on about the direct influence of espresso on expressions. My little blog section 'The Qahwa Room' is an outcome of bleary afternoons when inspiration and work simultaneously forsake me. When siesta time was up, my java cup filled my nous with thoughts of alternative diversions. And suddenly the cup became the idea itself. And now the idea mug keeps runneth over freshly brewed, and creamed every week.

I <3 Coffee.

Etyma

Image Courtesy Coffee Break USA

Exploring the roots of coffee led me to a verdure of metadata. Weeding out the tedious details, here are some fulgurant facts:

• Dissemination: Coffee drinking began in 15th-century Arabia. It reached Europe by the mid 17th century and immediately became hugely popular. 
  
• 19th Century Brew: One 1844 cookbook instructed people to use a much higher coffee/water ratio than we favor today (one tablespoon per sixteen ounces); boil the brew for almost a half an hour (today people are instructed never to boil coffee); and add fish skin, isinglass (a gelatin made from the air bladders of fish), or egg shells to reduce the acidity brought out by boiling the beans so long (today we would discard overly acidic coffee). Coffee yielded from this recipe would strike modern coffee lovers as intolerably strong and acidic; moreover, it would have little aroma.
• Caffeine Content: a six-ounce (2.72 kilograms) cup of coffee contains 100 milligrams of caffeine, more than comparable amounts of tea (50 milligrams), cola (25 milligrams), or cocoa (15 milligrams).
• Addiction: Coffee is now consumed by about one-third of the world's population. 85 per cent Americans begin their day by making some form of the drink, and the average American will consume three cups of it over the course of the day.  

Info courtesy Answers.com

Wide Awake Drunk

Yep, that's what you get when you combine

as much as three cups of coffee with three cans of beer

reports CNN.


A 'Public Health Concern' has been issued by the FDA against my favorite beverage - the innocent, potable java. Now, now, before you think they have had a mug too many of their decaf, let me relate the entire facts.

The FDA's announcement follows a year-long study by the agency, which concluded that the caffeine added to the malt liquors was an "unsafe food additive."

Four Loko, the brand which has stirred the storm defends, since previous combination with alcohol like Irish coffee have been consumed safely, they figured that mixing it with beer wouldn't be all that bad either. So, they decided to notch up the fun quotient.

 
 
So now we have Dr. Mary Claire O'Brien on backs of groggy Americans bleating

If you're going to drink caffeine, drink it responsibly...because you might not know when you've had too much to drink.

 Bah!
 Image Courtesy Ideal Truth 

Brewing over

Although I have begun to discuss my adoration of coffee in recent times, the love affair was legitimized last November, by a wonderful present from a precious friend.
While residing away from home, on more than one occasion, we had landed at Croma, then the largest shiny looking electronics and gadget store.
During the process of estimating the quickest way to make healthy meals, assessing juicers, toasters, microwaves, etc. I would steer us to the coffee maker aisle. Mooning over their 'one cup coffee maker', I'd expressively raise my eyebrows, asking for permission from my friend to actify on my intentions, while a rookie salesperson rattled away the features from the Product Tag. Then, patiently each time, I would be weaned away with reason.
So it was indeed a pleasurable delight when the same friend gifted me a DeLonghi Steam Driven Cappuccino and Espresso Coffee Maker.

This lean-mean coffee making machine has a 4-cup capacity, with a 2-cup adapter for making 2 espressos simultaneously (as illustrated in the picture alongside). Its swivel jet frother produces thick froth for authentic Italian cappucinos and lattes.
Plain to operate, but the variety of styles and flavorings I have tried in this little champ are countless.








There is a Dutch saying

    Coffee has two virtues: it is wet and warm.

Every afternoon, when my eyelids become heavy, and sleep threatens to overpower consciousness, this Java dispenser cheers the heart.

Quote of the Week

A cup of coffee - real coffee - home-browned, home ground, home made, that comes to you dark as a hazel-eye, but changes to a golden bronze as you temper it with cream that never cheated, but was real cream from its birth, thick, tenderly yellow, perfectly sweet, neither lumpy nor frothing on the Java: such a cup of coffee is a match for twenty blue devils and will exorcise them all.

And Henry Ward Beecher was absolutely right! I am supposedly on a diet, but exception is made for my afternoon mocha. Nothing but whole cream with 100% fat is spooned into the steaming cup.

Keep it toasty

If nothing else, the daylight saving shift on the first weekend of November tolls in the onset of dull and gray afternoons to follow. Although meteorologists predict snow only by mid-November, rain and chilly winds from over the Lake Erie have already begun to numb me upto the bone.
My only solace is wrapping my purpling fingers gingery around a cup of coffee, while I curl up with my Omnibus copy of Mr Jeeves snugly under a blanket. So it wouldn't do if the mug cooled even before I'd had chance to savor two long sips.
To prevent me from losing my mojo and my mocha from losing heat, I was presented with this handy Mug Warmer of Mr Coffee.
Unlike the widely publicized USB version, this has an electric socket, with a long chord, which reaches all the way across from my dining table. So now, I make a pot of coffee, and leave it on the cup warmer, to decoct till I am ready for my next page to be turned. The package claims that it is also great for keeping warm soup. Well, I will learn more on that when I fall sick and bring warm some chicken soup.

Coffee Sot

Earlier today, I was speaking to my aunt, inquiring about the family grapevine, and other juicy gossip, if any. We ended up on the topic of the severe cold which has already clutched the town; and this I stated was my reason for nursing a constant sniffle and a dreadful cough.

She suggested that I try some rum with my coffee, since brandy in warm water was not suiting my taste buds. All at once, I was all ears to her otherwise patronizing speeches. She went on to explain that it is stupid if I did not drink this, as the weather was being such a bitch (not in those exact words, since we were speaking in our mother tongue Gujarati).
This got me thinking (something I don't seem to be able to do very well without the crutch of 'Google'). Turns out, she is not very far from the truth. Empowered Doctor says

Alcohol may not be a "cure-all" cold remedy, but moderate consumption may reduce susceptibility to getting a cold, as well as lowering your risk of several major chronic illnesses.

Fresh Coffee Shop has collated all the hot coffee recipes with alcohol in a single page for easy reference. So bring out your cocktail mixing set and shake it like you mean it.
Yay to coffee, yay to rum. Ta Ra Rum Pum.

Kaleidoscopic Koffie

Over the last decade, I have been romancing roasted beans with an increasing fondness. The thrill from the first whift of the beans being roasted, grinded, pressed and filtered, I can't get enough.

So, I decided to start this series of blogs where I will share insights of my deepening love for a cup of muddy water. In the process, I plan to ween away some tea connoisseurs to my camp.
The Qahwa Room is now 'open'.